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I'm a Hacker! I'm a Rock Star!
by Jenn
for thisisarecording.com
May 15 2004
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If you've been in one "hacker chat room," you've been in them all. On AOL, Yahoo, or whereever... 10, 5 or 3 years ago (Someone even asked for a credit card generator (!!!))... Same shit, different room. Men of various ages, the younger ones doing most of the chatting, looking for hackers to do things for them like hack someone else's email or teach them how to hack. Chat acronyms and misspellings abound. If it wasn't so comical, the level of testosterone, complete with it's playground psychology ("Are there any REAL hackers here who can answer my question?") would be unbearable. A few people who know more than the others hang in the shadows until someone shows "promise." Fast paced, mostly noise from bickering. For best results, the following log should be read like a Jerky Boys prank call.] Me: It's about time that the hacker stereotype is transformed from fat comic book guy types to studly dade murphy. Me: Where da hacker groupies at? Cuz us hackers are muddafarking rockstars! [Should be we, not us.] [Someone denies me access to their webcam] Me: dangit lemme in your webcam. im a rockstar! Chat User: people dont understand that I am a normal person in <snip> not a question call girl... Me: call girl? where dey at? Chat User: she did Me: she? where? where da rockstar groupies at? Chat User: and for crackhead lamers Me: crackwhores? where da crackwhores at? [Someone with a conspicuously female screen name enters the room.] Girl1 joined the room Me: ooh its a girl! Me: hi Girl1 [She IMs me] Girl: do i know you Me: no. but i AM a rockstar Girl: im happy for you Me: *cheer* Me: me too Me: you a hacker groupie? Me: cuz hackers are rockstars, after all Me: you can be my girl. ill take you under my wing [...somebody should. They have twisted ways. And you'll believe what they say...] Girl: i just need the password for someones account can you do that Me: yes. but before we do that, we should get to know each other Me: im dan. im 18. you? Girl: sweetie im sure you are nice but im married and all im trying to do is find out whats in my husbands email so please help ok Me: ohh well ok Girl: will you help me Me: sure. just tell me everything i need to know Girl: what do you need Me: username, with what co the accnt is with Me: i can figure out the rest Girl: [Email address] [/me Googles email address] Me: is he a daytrader? Girl: trying to be Me: yes i see that... Me: so what are we lookin... oh wait hello Me: his email says you should leave him and get with me Me: because im a rockstar Girl: be serious Me: ok im just teasing. i googled the email, im not in his account. it was a prank. i hope youre not mad Girl: im not being rude i just need the help Me: i cant help you. sorry Girl: then why did you waste my time Me: calm down it was a joke, a prank a haha Me: i knew from the start i was gonna say the rockstar line at the end Me: that was the punchline. im sorry for wasting your time though. good luck finding the help you need Girl: you immature idiot [8,( Coooooooondemnaaaaation...] |
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